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Post by • naruto [ uzumaki ] on Feb 15, 2009 10:36:35 GMT -5
[/color][/center] to this day naruto felt like he never could forget what happened. not now not ever. he bore the scars as a reminder to his pain. he never seemed to be able to stop himself remembering no matter how hard he tried. truth be told he tried ever so hard. he even stopped leaving himself little reminders over the pain that man had caused with just the first time.
it was a cool summers evening and in the park lay a young blond of about eight or nine years old. he had previously been playing at the park with his friends before they had been taken home by their parents. of course with no family of his own to go home to - other than one of his two guardians - naruto was able to stay out and watch the sun set. alone.
though, for some reason he felt wary. he felt as though something bad was going to happen. though carefree and young naruto pushed aside the worry thoughts as he lay on his back in the park waiting for the stars to come out so he could make his way home. he was relaxed until he heard the footsteps approaching him. startled he sat up only to feel his mouth covered by a hand as nother arm slid around his waist. "stay still boy." his captor hissed. naruto could do nothing but stop struggling.
to say he was scared was an understatment. naruto was petrified of what this man would to do him. so when he felt himself lifted off the ground he started to lash out before freezing as he felt the captors hands slip into his blue shorts. a dark blush spread across naruto's cheeks. what was this man doing to him? men didn't touch little boys like him down there did they? wasn't that place not to be touched until he was older? naruto was so confused.
naruto gasped as he pulled himself out of the 'nightmare'. he was stood in the boys toilets his hands gripping onto the sink. his body was trembling as he let go of the sink and turned the tap so the water began running. he splashed his face as he took deep breaths trying to calm down. that flashback had been so long. it was the worst he'd had so far this week. but he knew he just had to grin and bear it. maybe one day they'd go away.
.words. 407^^
.tagged. any boys o-o
.notes. emoness... sorta....
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Sabaku Gaara
beautiful people
Why do I exist and live?
Posts: 8 
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Post by Sabaku Gaara on Feb 16, 2009 17:23:12 GMT -5
  I don't want to cause you trouble, don't want to stay too long.
He moved slowly down the hallway, his stomach turning over and over again. He'd gotten up out of class and walked out, not caring much about the reprimands he'd face once he returned...if he returned. His pale skin seemed to be bleached even further under the florescent lights in the hallway, contrasting even more with his red hair and tattoo. Small beads of sweat were on his forehead, and yet his face remained blank. His body was suffering; he didn't know why, but he didn't care, either. Gaara still didn't pick up the pace, no matter how horrible he felt. It was just another day to him, even though he felt as though he would collapse at any moment. What was the difference between physical and emotional pain? He felt the latter everyday; it was much worse then anything his body could physically be put through. It explained the reason he was walking as though he didn't have a care in the world, the way he normally walked. So many people rushed on one occasion or another, but not Gaara. Time meant nothing to him.
Gaara pushed the bathroom door opened just enough so he could slip inside. There was someone else in there, but he paid no attention to them, and instead went to a stall and shut the door behind him. He barely had time to lean over the toilet before the contents of his breakfast and the previous night's dinner spilled out of him. The male was dizzy, and couldn't stand up on his feet any longer. He dropped down to his knees, not caring much about the fact that he was in a public bathroom. He knew there was someone else present, but even if he did want to quit throwing up, he couldn't anyway. The taste in his mouth was disgusting, but before he could think anymore about that it, his stomach shed whatever else was left inside of it. His body shuddered, and with one last heave, his stomach was free of any contents.
Breathing heavily, he shakily grabbed some toilet paper, cleaning up around his mouth, as well as patting his forehead to clear the beads of sweat still present on his forehead. Tossing the paper into the toilet, he leaned over and flushed it, unable to find the strength to stand up yet. Aside from being sick, he hadn't gotten a wink of sleep in the past three nights, so his body was weaker then normal. He felt weak and vulnerable, and he hated it. He refused to be that way, and so despite his body's protest, Gaara stood up. He reeled slightly, took in a deep breath, and straightened up and opened the door to his stall. He stopped for a moment, noticing the spiky haired boy by the sink. He had seen him upon entering, but hadn't realized it was Naruto. His hardened eyes softened a little, a difference so slight that it probably wouldn't be noticed unless he was being watched directly, or someone knew him extremely well.
He said nothing, but instead went to the sink beside the one person he considered to be a friend. He turned the water on, rinsing out his mouth as best he could, before spitting it back into the sink. Wiping the access water away from his mouth, he turned the sink back off, then looked at Naruto through the mirror hanging on the wall. He recognized the face he was making, it reminded him of himself, upon waking up from the rare moments of sleep he got, or when he began to think of his past. Gaara didn't like seeing Naruto in so much pain, though it was something that brought them together. Their eyes were the same, it was why he'd given Naruto a chance when no one else got the time of day. He even seriously considered putting his hand on the male's shoulder, but decided against it. It might just make things worse. "They'll never stop," he said quietly, though there was no cruel intent in his voice. He was aware that it wouldn't be useful or comforting at all, but he wasn't going to lie and tell him things would get better. In Gaara's experience, the past never went away, and instead attacked whenever one didn't expect it.
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Post by • naruto [ uzumaki ] on Feb 16, 2009 18:13:22 GMT -5
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naruto didn't like this. not in the slightest. the pain the other had caused him fresh in his mind. it took all of his will not to just cry. but he knew he had to take it. take it and lived with it. if he'd told iruka and kakashi straight away maybe the pain would've have lasted this long. kami-sama, he hated thinking like that. but sometimes the flashbacks, the memories of a pain he would never forget, got too much for him. he could never truly escape. never truly forget about what that monster had done to him.
his attention had been focused on trying to calm himself upon gaara's entrance so he didn't know the other was there until he heard the familiar voice. he tensed at first before relaxing and turning his head to look at gaara. there was only three people naruto had ever told about one happened. gaara was one of them. why? because he knew the other would understand his pain. he turned his head to look at gaara before giving a small smile in gaara's direction the others pressence making him feel a little better.
he sighed softly at the red heads words before reaching over and taking hold of gaara's hand, though only lightly as he understood the others discomfort with human contact. tough of course naruto was the type of person who craved it so he comprimised. "i know gaara... but i thought they'd at least get better by now." he muttered as he pressed his palm against his eyes before running it up through his spikey hair making his hair stand up more. he sighed again before hanging his head.
gaara was the only person of his own age that had seen him like this. though of course naruto couldn't stand the pity or concern of others. thats why he still played the clone no matter what. he gave gaara's hand a light squeeze before letting go of it. dropping his hand to his side he forced his usual smile on his face and checked it in the mirror before turning to gaara. "anyway gaara-kun, you alright?" the blond asked the other. he wasn't the time to stay depressed all the time.
however at one point he had let that man completely ruin his life. the numerous scars hidden by the sweatband he wore around his wrist. he wasn't sure if anyone knew what was hidden beneath it. perhapse he'd told gaara at one point, he couldn't remember. but they were all healed now. he didn't want to go back to an unstable state. but at this rate he was sure he would. this many flashbacks was far too much even for this hyperactive blond. "ne, gaara-kun i heard you being sick before..." he muttered before going to glomp the red head.
naruto's unpredictability was become predictable.
.words. 473
.tagged. gaagaa-chan
.notes. hehe much better!
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Sabaku Gaara
beautiful people
Why do I exist and live?
Posts: 8
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Post by Sabaku Gaara on Feb 17, 2009 0:53:56 GMT -5
There's so much left in the air, so much to tell from a stare.
When Naruto took his hand, he fought against himself to resist the urge of slapping it away. He was doing better, that was true, but he wasn't healed yet, and probably wouldn't be for a very long time. He took in a quick breath, then managed to be content and lightly tightened his fingers around the other's hand. It just went to show the deep bond between them, for Gaara to put up with and maybe even slightly enjoy the small instances of physical contact shared between them. There was no way around it--Gaara loved Naruto.
Now, don't be mistaken, it was by no means romantic. Instead, it was a love shared between too very good friends, those closer then brothers, closer then Gaara was to his actual brother. They shared secrets with one another, things that no one else could hear. They kept them from the rest of the world, but were able to find at least a shred of comfort with each other. To Gaara, it made the world of difference. Naruto had somehow managed to restore some of his humanity, something he had once thought was lost forever. He owed the blonde a great debt, and would do whatever he could to help his charismatic friend when he was able.
His own hand fell back to his side once Naruto let it go, as he lifted a corner of his mouth into a half smile. "I'll live," was all that he would say in response to the question of whether he was alright or not. Gaara watched his friend get closer, before he could respond to what else he said or even brace himself, he was, as Naruto called it, 'glomped'. He was still unsteady and lost his footing, almost falling down to the ground. Somehow, his body responded to his will, and he managed to catch himself. In the meantime, he had grasped onto Naruto, in a strange version of a hug. "Naruto-kun..." he said in an unintentional growl, his comfort level plunging. Gaara didn't want to hurt the boy's feelings, but it was too much for him to handle. He pulled away and took a couple steps back, though almost instantly regretted it, but in the same sense, he knew that the blonde would understand. "It's still difficult for me, even with you," the redhead said, even though there was no reason for him to try and explain it.
"Do you want to spend the night at my house tonight?" he questioned, keeping his eyes on his closest friend. "I don't think Temari will mind..." he added, though the indifference in his voice signified that he didn't care about what she thought. Still, he was trying to be more considerate towards his siblings, though they hadn't ever been there for him when needed. Gaara was attempting to not be so bitter, since all it did was cause him even more pain. That was easier said then done, though.
Normally, it was children who had sleep overs in Gaara's opinion, but he had missed out on that when he was younger, and he wasn't that old. But, he felt he might be of more help to Naruto if he was able to be around him, and he could stop him from doing that again. His mint colored eyes flickered to the band around Naruto's wrist for a moment. Gaara was a lot more perceptive then people gave him credit for. He was far from innocent when it came to injuring one's self, but he had mostly quit, thanks to Naruto. He wanted to be able to provide the same support that he had received, even if it would be difficult for him.
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Post by • naruto [ uzumaki ] on Feb 19, 2009 16:26:49 GMT -5
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naruto scowled as he heard gaara's reassurance that he'd be alright. like hell he would! they were both so messed up that it was doubtful that they'd ever live through all this. so gaara saying he'd live meant nothing to naruto. it would have been more effective if gaara knew how to speak in clearly appytones. even if they were just a facaide like naruto's own. though naruto wouldn't press the subject. just like he didn't like peope pressing about his flashbacks or why he'd just suddenly run out of class - like he had just before.
he forced his smile to be even brighter as he wrapped his arms around gaara's neck as the two of them came into physical contact due to his glomping. he pouted hearing the others tone before nuzzling him quickly. he yelped as gaara pulled away almost causing him to lmost fall over. though luckily he caught his balance and staggered back slightly. "gaara-kun!" the blond huffed as he folded his arms. truthfully he understood what the other was feeling. even without him having to say it. he was just playing along with his facade.
he sighed and unfolded his arms. "i know. i'm sorry gaara..." he sighed. he shook his head softly a he tried to think of something to say to change the subject before blinking at gaara's somewhat random question. he tilted his head curiously at the other. gaara wanted him to come over? i mean true they were real close friends but because of their pasts there were two big problems. firstly the two of them rarely slept a full night - if indeed at all - and second... well they didn't really like sleeping if someone was around them. well naruto didn't anyway.
a soft chuckle past through the blonds lips as he tilted his head giving a childish, bright and fake smile in the others direction. " sure thing gaara-kun! I'd love to spend the night with you." He chimed with a slight and put on perverted tone to his words. he had to do it. without replacing his facade of the childish and somewhat-perverted jock he was around the school naruto wasn't sure he'd be able to make the day last. flashbacks or no flashbacks he was still uzumaki naruto. the schools biggest idiot.
[ooc; eew shortness >.<]
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